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Yes, I said it…

Have you ever been told that the less needs you have the more likely a man is to want to marry you?

Do you believe that your needs will make you appear needy to a man, and no man wants a needy woman?

Let me clarify this for you, from a male perspective.

For generations women have been trying this exact same strategy. Put his needs before yours. Don’t even mention your needs so you don’t appear needy. And keep a smile on your face so he thinks everything is great even when it is not.

See, you have been programmed to believe that if you just put everyone else’s needs first then your man will always love you. That when you make this one sacrifice it guarantees you will be rewarded with a life-long relationship. I mean, that’s what they told you, right?

But what really happens?

You make this sacrifice and put everyone’s needs ahead of yours. You give and give and give…and for a minute or two, it seemed to be working…but it doesn’t last because no one can give and give and give without eventually becoming exhausted.

Sooner or later you feel unappreciated.  Like he doesn’t even notice how much you are giving to the relationship.  It feels like you are the only one trying to make things work.  He just takes, takes, takes without even saying thank you.

What would happen if you stopped denying your needs and started putting your needs first instead?

Slap my face!

Did I just say put YOUR needs first?

Yes I did.  And I help women do this all the time.

When Zelia came to me she didn’t know how to own what she needed to be her best self in a relationship.  She had been putting everyone else’s needs first for so long she couldn’t believe a man would actually want to support her in fulfilling her needs.  But once we updated this programing she sent me this…

“Thank you for teaching me how to own what I need to be my best self. It really does work! It allows me to speak my truth, respect myself and the other person, and it fosters respectful communication. I’m loving it!”

First you have to get clear on what your needs are.  We’re talking needs here and not wants. There is a big difference. Next you must own these needs and that you are worthy of them. And then make the shift from putting your needs last to putting them first.

And once you do this you will be amazed at how seen and understood you feel, the give, give, give will turn into a beautiful flow of give and take, and you will start attracting men who’s greatest desire is to support you in having your needs fulfilled without ever being seen as needy.

Every man on this planet is hardwired to be a provider for his partner. The truth is if you don’t have needs, men don’t have a role in your life and they will leave.

If you are ready to do what it takes to be in a balanced partnership instead of a one way relationship then schedule a free call with me by clicking here and we’ll get clear on your best next step to being your best and in love.

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